She’s a girl with
ebony eyes. Devastating beauty. The kind of girl who can’t be beat…
Been spending most our
lives living in a pastime paradise. Been spending most our lives living in a
future paradise…
Love’s in need of
love. Don’t delay. Send yours in right away...
You are the joy inside
my tears…
Going back to Saturn
where the people smile. Don’t need cars because we've learned to fly. On Saturn…
Today I took a Pilates class at the place that I usually
take yoga and dance. The class was called “Hot Mess Pilates.” (Don’t worry I won’t
ignore the fact that I wrote lyrics from Stevie Wonder’s "Songs in the Key of Life" above. I’ll explain more about that later). I always avoided this pilates
class when I saw it on the class schedule because the name of the class made
me assume that it made you feel like a hot mess and that simply doesn't sound
nice no matter how you spin it. But something in my soul was calling for the
community experience of a class today. What is it about Sundays that makes me
want to have my personal spiritual awakening in a group setting? I had already
done my morning meditation, but still I wanted something more. Meditation is so…solitary.
Besides, I had already missed the 2 earlier classes. So Hot Mess Pilates it
was. I found out that the class is called that, not because it makes you feel
like a hot mess, but because its great for when you’re feeling like a hot mess.
It also happens that the class is held in a “hot” room (90 degrees). Not as hot
as the yoga classes but still hot enough for some sweaty, intense core strengthening.
The class was exactly what the doctor ordered. It busted my
ass, but I came out feeling amazing, and I got my fix of that spiritual community
bonding that I so often crave on Sundays. Then I had an incredible realization.
Somehow I had forgotten that lately I had become aware of a sense of weakness
in my core (my abdomen, sacrum, hips, pelvis…) and that I was looking for a
good workout for this region, particularly for my voice (yes, your core is
related to your vocal strength as well as your will). How could I have
forgotten that this was exactly what I had been asking for?
Could it be that I only thought that I forgot but
that on some deeper level I hadn't forgotten at all and that is why I was drawn to take the class? Have you ever
“forgotten” that you asked for something and somehow you are led to exactly what
you requested though it seems you forgot you asked for it in the first place?
Funny how things work out. And why was I avoiding the class in the first place?
Een-ta-resting! Een-ta-resting indeed!
Could it be that sometimes we run from exactly what we need, even while we are
still asking for it?? It's as if we’re tangled up in some crazy dance of desiring,
then forgetting the desire, then obtaining (what we desired), and finding that
it's exactly what we needed or that we didn't need it at all in the first place.
I've found that whatever we ask for on a deep level (dare I say
pray for?), we usually get. So what are you asking for? Why not bring some
awareness to your asking so that when you finally get it, you’ll at least
remember that this is exactly what you wanted in the first place? It will save you the time of
wondering if this is what you want (remember you asked for it), and you can get
right down to the work of using the gift in the service of your growth. And it will also make you realize how frequently you "ask" for things that you don't really want. Awareness helps.
Come to think of it. This morning I actually was feeling
like somewhat of a “hot mess”- my back hurt and I felt miles away from my body.
So I was calling for that class on multiple levels. What are you calling for? Do
you know? Make sure that something you asked for doesn't fall in your lap, but you were too resistant to notice that it was exactly what the doctor ordered. And the
doctor is of course you.
About the Stevie Wonder lyrics that this post started with…they’re
completely unrelated. I've just had that entire album stuck in my head all day.
I thought writing some of the lyrics would help get it out of my head but no...
On that note,
You can feel it all ooooover! You can it feel it all
oooover!
P.S. If you've read this post and you've never listened to "Songs in the Key of Life"from start to finish, I cast my eyes down in shame. You should have been listening to that album
and not reading this. GO. Now.
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