DON'T BE SCURRED! JUMP ON AND RIDE!

Have you ever been terrified to do something that you absolutely want to do? Have you ever been terrified to do something that you know on a deep level that you need to do? Chances are, you have. I’m pretty sure this is a universal experience. If you’re the type that claims that you don’t “get scared”, please do hand me over some of that- whatever you use to not experience this thing that I’m pretty sure is unavoidable, even if rare.

I learned to ride a bike last year. Crazy, right? Funny thing is not knowing how to ride a bike never struck me as odd in my childhood. My siblings and I did many things to entertain ourselves. My older siblings knew how to ride and my oldest brother had a bike which he rode every now and again, but bike riding was never high on the priority list for me. We played outside, went to friends’ houses, and had an endless array of made up games for which we employed our toys.  I read and daydreamed endlessly. Nothing seemed to be missing in the entertainment arena. 5, and then 6, children growing up together in close quarters is entertainment enough.

The fact that I couldn’t ride a bike became a problem when I visited friends who wanted to ride bikes; at which point, they would invariably attempt to teach me, which always just left me with scratches and hurt shins and ankles.

I had my driver’s license by the time I was 15, and my own car by the time I was 16. I didn’t take bike riding seriously until I moved to a big city. I came to admire people who didn’t rely on public transportation or cars to get around. They seemed so free! Plus, they were getting to exercise while going from point A to point B and they were going faster than walkers and most runners.  I would see them riding over the bridges of NYC smiling. “Give me some-a that,” I would think. When I first moved to Philadelphia, I kept quiet whenever the subject of bike riding came up in conversation, until I realized that the odd facts about me can actually be interesting and valuable to my art in many ways. And by then, a few friends had attempted to teach me to ride a bike, and I was becoming frustrated at how what seemed to be so easy constantly eluded me.

When I began to make serious progress and it started to look like I would be riding on my own any day, it dawned on me that I was completely terrified to ride a bike. I never wanted to stop learning! Actually doing this thing seemed insane! Suddenly, I wanted to avoid the lessons at all cost because I knew that if I kept going that soon I would no longer need them. Can you believe that foolishness?

Thankfully, I did face my fear and make myself keep practicing because I love riding my bike now. Within a few months of learning how to ride I got to bike all over Paris, Amsterdam, and other cities in Europe.

The funny thing about fear is that usually it is unfounded. Most of the time, when you face it and stare it down, you find that it is nothing but a phantom following you around simply because you let it.

This is not to say that certain mountains we have to climb aren’t tough ones, and the thought of certain things we must accomplish justifiably may cause some fear.

I have spent days afraid to do one thing that is on my to do list. Maybe I don’t know I’m afraid at first. I just get a sense that I am avoiding it. I procrastinate. I do every other thing on the list and just look at that one like it’s going to take care of itself if I’m productive in other ways. Yeah. You know those days where you tell yourself those stories? You’re standing in your kitchen reaching for another cookie, sitting at your computer wandering over to facebook for the 3^rd time in the hour, thinking about every other thing you have to get accomplished but you know really isn’t relevant to that one big thing that you’re treating with a sly avoidance. Yeah, Maybe you’re scared. It happens.

Why are you scared? I don’t know. Don’t ask me. I just learned to ride a bike last year.

Here’s what I can tell you:

Our fears are only as large we you make them. The relief you feel at your accomplishment will outweigh any fear you may have experienced. The fear will melt away as soon as you jump on and start to ride.